Sunday, December 30, 2012

This is 40*cough*30. Life with middle school kids.

Just saw the movie This is 40 with Brando. I don't want to forget how much I relate to that movie right now, so I can look back on this time period in our lives via that movie at a later date and realize how far we have come.

Brando and I figure the basis of the movie has a LOT less to do with the age of the people than the age of the kids. My sister always told me how difficult teenage years are on a marriage, how the trials you go through with teenagers can rip marriages apart. I try to hang onto remembering how difficult teenage years are on a marriage every time we go through another episode of a boy wanting to be a man, yet still wanting to be a boy at the same time. *Almost* everything in that movie Brando and I could relate to, only switch the guy being overwhelmed by girls with the girl being overwhelmed by boys.

The technology issue - totally dealt with and recently. In the process of giving up on the way technology has taken over now. Not in a bad way. In a this is the way our kids live these days so I better figure out a way to work around the technology. Like it or not, my kiddos are learning leadership skills, building communities, buildings, and electrically engineering buildings, all with technology, and playing with their Dad to boot. Just need to work on the active part. Justinbustin does enough when sports are in season. I just don't like doing activity on my own, but I've got to start. The only time they will do something is when I've already done the experience and discipline of doing the experience on my own.

Other thing I relate to is how wonderful time alone is - how time alone as a couple InSTANTLY makes you remember why you fell in love with each other, and wonder why things are so crazy and stressed at home. Also, we relate to the exact feeling of 'we're ba-ack' once you pull up the driveway.

As I told Brando tonight, I think I like movies with the word f*ck a lot. I'm laughing as I'm typing, but seriously, they didn't use the word when they weren't fighting or being funny, and that's really exactly what I do. So hearing that language in those situations is life to me. I almost don't even notice. I remember long ago there was a movie with Mel Gibson that I LOVEd. I recommended the movie to my sis and bro-in-law. Then, they mentioned there was the f word a LOT in that movie. Oops, I didn't even remember. That's also the time I stopped recommending movies to people.

The best part of the movie was the knowing laughs of the couples in the theatre (all couples exactly exemplifying the title) and the different sexes laughing at different scenes. I tried not to die laughing at the farting scene so I wouldn't be calling Brando out. But seriously. I was DYING laughing. DYING I tell ya.

The music conversation? So had that conversation LAST NIGHT. Took Brando through all the songs I like - he says they're mellow and depressing. He took me through the music he likes - I said his music is annoying as hell. Loved seeing that scene thrown in there. Instantly relatable.

Also? The pregnancy scene? COULD SO FREAKING RELATE. Except, of course, mine ended as a chemical pregnancy. But man the sheer terror, wondering what the f*ck was going to happen. I almost wonder if I ever got pregnant again if I might not tell Brando for awhile just to keep from falling apart again. That would actually work better for me. I'm already not drinking any way. He wouldn't know the difference until we had a few months left haha.

The sex conversation? Okay, well we don't exactly have the conversation like they did, but sex is still an issue. I want more sex than he can handle. And you know why? He's stressed as f*ck taking care of his family. And in the moments he happens to not be stressed, he blows my mind. Like last night. Eight orgasms. Um, yeah. But when stress is high? Forgedaboudit.

No, but seriously, as depressing as this may sound, This is 40 (aka Life with middle school kids) made me feel better about life. If they're making a movie out of all this stress - financial, kids, parents, all of these stresses - that means this part of life is actually way more normal than people talk about. I already realized so, but don't know how to make other people realize so because all the behind-the-scenes is SO NOT talked about. Everybody thinks your prince is supposed to come and take you away. Well, they do. But then life happens. And it's stressful as f*ck. And somehow you get through marriage and life any way with a laugh and a f*ck, literal and verbal. And your prince is still there in the end. And THAT's what matters.

By the way, middle school life is where I'm at these days. Blogging, you're on the back burner. Oh, how I miss you. But when my kids don't need me 90% of the time these days, being there 100% during the 10% of the time they do need me is my priority. And I love it. Wife. Mom. Superwoman. That's me.



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