Scared Poopless

We're taking off tomorrow for California, so if I'm not on here for awhile you know why. We got our first taste of drama the other night, so PLEEEASE pray for no drama. Oh man I can't handle that stuff. *sigh* Off we go. See you in Cali!!!

Scared Poopless

We're taking off tomorrow for California, so if I'm not on here for awhile you know why. We got our first taste of drama the other night, so PLEEEASE pray for no drama. Oh man I can't handle that stuff. *sigh* Off we go. See you in Cali!!!

Hello? Hello? Anybody there? Echo!

(compliments of Yahoo Messenger)

There's no furniture left in the house. The beds, table, and washer/dryer went into storage today. The boys are sleeping on mattresses and us on either the sleeper sofa (which our renter is going to use) or an air mattress. It's a toss up. The boys have gone wild! My hubby says they have "more room" to get into trouble. They are enjoying the open empty space and utilizing it to the best of their abilities.

My Lil' Guy got a hold of the baby wipes today and I saw him going back and forth behind me to get new ones. After a few trips I asked him what he was doing and he looks at me with his big brown eyes and says "Cleaning that bam-bam." He was talking about Hubby's drum in the corner. Too cute : ) .

The other day I cleaned out the guest bathroom to put in the boxes going to California and told the boys not to use that bathroom anymore. My Big Guy says, "I'm going to miss my bathroom." Awwww. I told him I know but you will have a new one at Grandma & Grandpa's.

We said good-bye to our good friends we've known since their first and our second was little tiny on Saturday. She cried as we left and Big Guy gave them hugs. She gave me her favorite blanket to "remember her by". I was silent all the way home. I am sad. I will miss my friends. Another life to make.

Hello? Hello? Anybody there? Echo!

(compliments of Yahoo Messenger)

There's no furniture left in the house. The beds, table, and washer/dryer went into storage today. The boys are sleeping on mattresses and us on either the sleeper sofa (which our renter is going to use) or an air mattress. It's a toss up. The boys have gone wild! My hubby says they have "more room" to get into trouble. They are enjoying the open empty space and utilizing it to the best of their abilities.

My Lil' Guy got a hold of the baby wipes today and I saw him going back and forth behind me to get new ones. After a few trips I asked him what he was doing and he looks at me with his big brown eyes and says "Cleaning that bam-bam." He was talking about Hubby's drum in the corner. Too cute : ) .

The other day I cleaned out the guest bathroom to put in the boxes going to California and told the boys not to use that bathroom anymore. My Big Guy says, "I'm going to miss my bathroom." Awwww. I told him I know but you will have a new one at Grandma & Grandpa's.

We said good-bye to our good friends we've known since their first and our second was little tiny on Saturday. She cried as we left and Big Guy gave them hugs. She gave me her favorite blanket to "remember her by". I was silent all the way home. I am sad. I will miss my friends. Another life to make.

Moving Out

The place is empty, bare. My hubby said before they moved all the furniture out into storage, "It's going to look sad in here real soon." I probably won't be on here much in the next week - the furniture's out, but we still got to get the beds, dining room table, and washer & dryer out the day before we go. Plus we still need to pack up the rest of the stuff we're taking to Cali. And clean. Lots to do. Our target date has moved up - to the morning of next Wednesday as we're ahead of schedule and my hubby's last day is Monday any way. After that I probably won't be on for the next week or so as we'll be on the road and unless we have a wireless connection somewhere along the way I won't be online. It's going to be an adventure (in a sing-song tone). Yee-haw! That'll be the last time I say that for awhile, make that the first and last :D .

Moving Out

The place is empty, bare. My hubby said before they moved all the furniture out into storage, "It's going to look sad in here real soon." I probably won't be on here much in the next week - the furniture's out, but we still got to get the beds, dining room table, and washer & dryer out the day before we go. Plus we still need to pack up the rest of the stuff we're taking to Cali. And clean. Lots to do. Our target date has moved up - to the morning of next Wednesday as we're ahead of schedule and my hubby's last day is Monday any way. After that I probably won't be on for the next week or so as we'll be on the road and unless we have a wireless connection somewhere along the way I won't be online. It's going to be an adventure (in a sing-song tone). Yee-haw! That'll be the last time I say that for awhile, make that the first and last :D .

All Things Considered

We moved a bunch of boxes into storage today. All the boxes I've packed up to stay in storage so far. It surprised me that it wasn't that many! Didn't even fill our van up. That's a good thing. I've gotten rid of tons of stuff and have a huge bin sitting outside right now and two more boxes inside to get rid of. Plus tons of trash. I was talking to my sister about getting rid of all the trash and how nice it is unless you think about the fact that all that stuff was just sitting inside your house. Ew. Thank God for Flylady otherwise I would've had a lot more.

All Things Considered

We moved a bunch of boxes into storage today. All the boxes I've packed up to stay in storage so far. It surprised me that it wasn't that many! Didn't even fill our van up. That's a good thing. I've gotten rid of tons of stuff and have a huge bin sitting outside right now and two more boxes inside to get rid of. Plus tons of trash. I was talking to my sister about getting rid of all the trash and how nice it is unless you think about the fact that all that stuff was just sitting inside your house. Ew. Thank God for Flylady otherwise I would've had a lot more.

Observation

My kiddo was singing this afternoon at the top of his lungs "I am a Christian! I am a Christian!" Apparently they were singing that at neighborhood church and 2 weeks later he decided to start singing it.

That got me to thinking, I am a Christian. And why I haven't blogged about that before. Just recently I've come across a few Christian people with blogs in the town that I am moving to - namely Kelly's blog. She is Christian, and unashamedly so, as are her friend's in their blogs. First of all I think it's amazing that so many of her friends have blogs, and going by her blog I can see why! Second I think it's awesome that they all mention their beliefs in their blogs.

All of this got me to thinking why I haven't metioned my beliefs on this blog.

I created this blog with the idea of having a place to vent, record sweet moments of my children, put my thoughts "on paper", and basically muse on life.

My relationship with God is constant, throughout - it's not that I spend a lot of time thinking about it, or not thinking about it, it's just He always is. Much as my hubby or my kids, but even more so. Not that he says cute little things like my kiddos, but He definently brings profound things to my attention through them, my husband, other people, and of course His Word.

I think most of all it is that I have had way too many "holier than thou" people in my life and I have always resisted coming across that way. Yes, God is in my life - God IS my life, and He works wondrous things, more so than I could ever imagine in my life and the lives of those around me. And if you ask me about my past I would tell you all the wondrous, amazing things God has done in it, and the things He continues to do.

Those thoughts aside, God is my life, He makes my life happen, and if I don't bring Him into this blog then I'm not really bringing my life to this blog and so I will, even at the cost of coming across as holier-than-thou which I hope I won't ever do and if it seems that way to you please do call it to my attention so I can make sure that my intent was true! As my favorite pastor Rene Schlaepfer puts it, 'God has wired you a certain way, I don't think He cares what you do as long as you do it for Him',

One thing I will say is that if you don't know Jesus you are missing out on a perfect relationship because I know no matter how much we think they can no human relationship can be perfect.

Observation

My kiddo was singing this afternoon at the top of his lungs "I am a Christian! I am a Christian!" Apparently they were singing that at neighborhood church and 2 weeks later he decided to start singing it.

That got me to thinking, I am a Christian. And why I haven't blogged about that before. Just recently I've come across a few Christian people with blogs in the town that I am moving to - namely Kelly's blog. She is Christian, and unashamedly so, as are her friend's in their blogs. First of all I think it's amazing that so many of her friends have blogs, and going by her blog I can see why! Second I think it's awesome that they all mention their beliefs in their blogs.

All of this got me to thinking why I haven't metioned my beliefs on this blog.

I created this blog with the idea of having a place to vent, record sweet moments of my children, put my thoughts "on paper", and basically muse on life.

My relationship with God is constant, throughout - it's not that I spend a lot of time thinking about it, or not thinking about it, it's just He always is. Much as my hubby or my kids, but even more so. Not that he says cute little things like my kiddos, but He definently brings profound things to my attention through them, my husband, other people, and of course His Word.

I think most of all it is that I have had way too many "holier than thou" people in my life and I have always resisted coming across that way. Yes, God is in my life - God IS my life, and He works wondrous things, more so than I could ever imagine in my life and the lives of those around me. And if you ask me about my past I would tell you all the wondrous, amazing things God has done in it, and the things He continues to do.

Those thoughts aside, God is my life, He makes my life happen, and if I don't bring Him into this blog then I'm not really bringing my life to this blog and so I will, even at the cost of coming across as holier-than-thou which I hope I won't ever do and if it seems that way to you please do call it to my attention so I can make sure that my intent was true! As my favorite pastor Rene Schlaepfer puts it, 'God has wired you a certain way, I don't think He cares what you do as long as you do it for Him',

One thing I will say is that if you don't know Jesus you are missing out on a perfect relationship because I know no matter how much we think they can no human relationship can be perfect.

So Much To Do

Well my posts haven't been quite "me" lately. I have been so overwhelmed lately my own self seems to be completely what I am not. I've been indecisive, insecure, yesterday I was depressed. Usually I struggle with the first two any way but can overcome them with decision. The second usually happens when I get to a breaking point, I cry, I complain, I feel depressed, then it's done. The insecurity and indecision drive me NUTS!

It's taken me awhile to even realize how indecisive I was in the first place and then took me another while to get over it, well now that I'm over it and falling back into it ARGH! I was really glad I got over it, I started a Girls Night Out group and we had some really great times, and it's even managed to keep going after I leave - well for this next time any way. I've enlisted a friend to take over the online group and another to keep up the hostess choosing for the next events. Hopefully that will work well! We had good times together and when I'm back out this way I'd love to attend them, and start up or join a new one in my new town! It'd even be nice to start one where we're going, if there's not already one in the works. I don't know if a year is enough time to make some friends and get them to get out of their homes for a night but heck I can try : ) !

The insecurity - well for a long time I had not introduced my friends to each other. And this summer I realized it was because I had been betrayed way back when by what I thought was a friend when I introduced her to my very good friend. So once I got over that and realized I shouldn't even consider those people friends if they would do that to you, then I realized how silly I was being with my friends. I had always wanted to introduce them to each other, I was just so afraid of getting taken I hadn't realized they were actually friends. So now that I have it's not been too bad. I did have one friend ask for another friend's friends phone number to invite her to something she only invited my friend, and then me, to as an afterthought. But what can you do?

I feel like I'm already gone from this place, my friends realize I'm moving and they have to go on with their lives. Though I am wondering why certain of them haven't offered to help me move. Makes me think I should make sure and have friends who would help me move. Actually two of them have and for that I am grateful, only one doesn't have a car, and the other is pregnant and possibly miscarrying! Funny how they are the most willing and helpful sweeties! Another friend has offered to take junk off my hands which is a BIG help believe it or not. We don't have a donation place open 5 days a week. They're only available to take donations Mon, Wed, and Fridays. Which is a big pain when you're moving! Any way so though she hasn't offered to help me move which I could understand as she has 3 little ones under 4, the getting rid of my junk has been really nice!! The other one lives an hour away now, and maybe I shouldn't feel this way and I really don't I just bring it up as a point of reference, I was there to help her at a drop of the hat when she moved, bringing stuff over and even cleaning her old place. But she hasn't even mentioned helping me or even seeing me before she goes. I know she has a lot on her plate but I also know that if she wanted to she could take the time, have her Mom watch her kids, and spend a day out here helping me pack up if she wanted. Maybe not this week, maybe next week, or last week, whatever. Maybe she still will! I'll hold onto that hope, because I love her as a friend, and I know she doesn't have many people that would be willing to do whatever it takes to help her out, and as a friend willing to do that for her, I'm hoping she'd be willing to do the same for me. Sheesh!! A month ago I wouldn't have questioned all this, I'd probably been able to make some sense of it all, and I'm not really questioning it now, I'm just wondering what it is that I'm feeling that I'm not seeing right now, and not seeing probably because I'm in the thick of it all. Time will tell.

So Much To Do

Well my posts haven't been quite "me" lately. I have been so overwhelmed lately my own self seems to be completely what I am not. I've been indecisive, insecure, yesterday I was depressed. Usually I struggle with the first two any way but can overcome them with decision. The second usually happens when I get to a breaking point, I cry, I complain, I feel depressed, then it's done. The insecurity and indecision drive me NUTS!

It's taken me awhile to even realize how indecisive I was in the first place and then took me another while to get over it, well now that I'm over it and falling back into it ARGH! I was really glad I got over it, I started a Girls Night Out group and we had some really great times, and it's even managed to keep going after I leave - well for this next time any way. I've enlisted a friend to take over the online group and another to keep up the hostess choosing for the next events. Hopefully that will work well! We had good times together and when I'm back out this way I'd love to attend them, and start up or join a new one in my new town! It'd even be nice to start one where we're going, if there's not already one in the works. I don't know if a year is enough time to make some friends and get them to get out of their homes for a night but heck I can try : ) !

The insecurity - well for a long time I had not introduced my friends to each other. And this summer I realized it was because I had been betrayed way back when by what I thought was a friend when I introduced her to my very good friend. So once I got over that and realized I shouldn't even consider those people friends if they would do that to you, then I realized how silly I was being with my friends. I had always wanted to introduce them to each other, I was just so afraid of getting taken I hadn't realized they were actually friends. So now that I have it's not been too bad. I did have one friend ask for another friend's friends phone number to invite her to something she only invited my friend, and then me, to as an afterthought. But what can you do?

I feel like I'm already gone from this place, my friends realize I'm moving and they have to go on with their lives. Though I am wondering why certain of them haven't offered to help me move. Makes me think I should make sure and have friends who would help me move. Actually two of them have and for that I am grateful, only one doesn't have a car, and the other is pregnant and possibly miscarrying! Funny how they are the most willing and helpful sweeties! Another friend has offered to take junk off my hands which is a BIG help believe it or not. We don't have a donation place open 5 days a week. They're only available to take donations Mon, Wed, and Fridays. Which is a big pain when you're moving! Any way so though she hasn't offered to help me move which I could understand as she has 3 little ones under 4, the getting rid of my junk has been really nice!! The other one lives an hour away now, and maybe I shouldn't feel this way and I really don't I just bring it up as a point of reference, I was there to help her at a drop of the hat when she moved, bringing stuff over and even cleaning her old place. But she hasn't even mentioned helping me or even seeing me before she goes. I know she has a lot on her plate but I also know that if she wanted to she could take the time, have her Mom watch her kids, and spend a day out here helping me pack up if she wanted. Maybe not this week, maybe next week, or last week, whatever. Maybe she still will! I'll hold onto that hope, because I love her as a friend, and I know she doesn't have many people that would be willing to do whatever it takes to help her out, and as a friend willing to do that for her, I'm hoping she'd be willing to do the same for me. Sheesh!! A month ago I wouldn't have questioned all this, I'd probably been able to make some sense of it all, and I'm not really questioning it now, I'm just wondering what it is that I'm feeling that I'm not seeing right now, and not seeing probably because I'm in the thick of it all. Time will tell.

My Days in an IM Nutshell

I have been soooo busy these past few days I don't even have time to type up an entry right now so I thought I'd post an IM from earlier. Is that totally lame? Oh well, I don't care, I don't have time and this is what I've been up to : D ! Yeah I know I'm queen of the long IM's today too :D . See? Just goes to show you I don't even have time to talk!!

Me: We rented out our house today! Our neighbor actually ended up taking us up on the offer, which is good, he's a really good tenant
Her: that's awesome!
Her: why is he moving out of his house now...is he renting that too
Me: Yes, he's rented that place since we've known him - he used to live next door when we lived in the apartments over there. He's only moving out cuz we offered him pretty much the same thing he's got going on now because we know at this point he can't afford more but he'll take care of the place like it was his own home. Plus we don't intend on moving back to this town and he doesn't see himself going anywhere so he can have it as long as he wants it. We signed a 2 year lease with him, so he'll be here for at least that unless under 'extrenuating circumstances'. it's a good thing
Her: thats great
Me: And we know he won't be late on rent
Her: what have you been up to today? any packing?
Me: Oh SHEESH, the question should be what HAVEN'T I been up to today. LOL We had 4 different people here at 1:30pm for 4 different things lol. My nephews came and took down the playset today, it was my little guy's last day with his lady that comes to the house, we signed the lease with our neighbor which took 2-3 hours because I read everything out loud mostly for our sake but his as well so we knew exactly what we were signing, hubby and my sister painted, the pest guy came out and sprayed for bugs, my bil came and picked up stuff, so I was pretty much orchestrating all day
Me: no packing, i did some last night, though, and my sister did some today for me
Her: man, busy girl
Her: what does your sister think about you moving
Me: She's sad, but I think she knows it's good for us. She still treats me like a lil sis in an odd sort of way which is weird because I can't really expect anything from her, though they do offer. I don't know what that has to do with anything except she made a weird comment about it. But it's nice she's been really helpful, and her bringing the boys over to take down that playset today was sooo helpful, they just got it done like that and with just my hubby it probably would've taken all day
Her: thats nice of her. i bet she is sad too because now she is the only one in here.
Her: is your other sister excited to have you back
Me: And her boys will miss our guys, ours will miss hers too!! Yeah my other sis is soo excited. She asked me the other day if I was going to be over at her house all the time and i said, no, we're gonna have our own life out there... why? do you WANT me to be over there all the time? and she says, 'well... yeah ' lol

My Days in an IM Nutshell

I have been soooo busy these past few days I don't even have time to type up an entry right now so I thought I'd post an IM from earlier. Is that totally lame? Oh well, I don't care, I don't have time and this is what I've been up to : D ! Yeah I know I'm queen of the long IM's today too :D . See? Just goes to show you I don't even have time to talk!!

Me: We rented out our house today! Our neighbor actually ended up taking us up on the offer, which is good, he's a really good tenant
Her: that's awesome!
Her: why is he moving out of his house now...is he renting that too
Me: Yes, he's rented that place since we've known him - he used to live next door when we lived in the apartments over there. He's only moving out cuz we offered him pretty much the same thing he's got going on now because we know at this point he can't afford more but he'll take care of the place like it was his own home. Plus we don't intend on moving back to this town and he doesn't see himself going anywhere so he can have it as long as he wants it. We signed a 2 year lease with him, so he'll be here for at least that unless under 'extrenuating circumstances'. it's a good thing
Her: thats great
Me: And we know he won't be late on rent
Her: what have you been up to today? any packing?
Me: Oh SHEESH, the question should be what HAVEN'T I been up to today. LOL We had 4 different people here at 1:30pm for 4 different things lol. My nephews came and took down the playset today, it was my little guy's last day with his lady that comes to the house, we signed the lease with our neighbor which took 2-3 hours because I read everything out loud mostly for our sake but his as well so we knew exactly what we were signing, hubby and my sister painted, the pest guy came out and sprayed for bugs, my bil came and picked up stuff, so I was pretty much orchestrating all day
Me: no packing, i did some last night, though, and my sister did some today for me
Her: man, busy girl
Her: what does your sister think about you moving
Me: She's sad, but I think she knows it's good for us. She still treats me like a lil sis in an odd sort of way which is weird because I can't really expect anything from her, though they do offer. I don't know what that has to do with anything except she made a weird comment about it. But it's nice she's been really helpful, and her bringing the boys over to take down that playset today was sooo helpful, they just got it done like that and with just my hubby it probably would've taken all day
Her: thats nice of her. i bet she is sad too because now she is the only one in here.
Her: is your other sister excited to have you back
Me: And her boys will miss our guys, ours will miss hers too!! Yeah my other sis is soo excited. She asked me the other day if I was going to be over at her house all the time and i said, no, we're gonna have our own life out there... why? do you WANT me to be over there all the time? and she says, 'well... yeah ' lol

Trackbacks

So I'm wondering, are trackbacks a common thing around here? I've now pinged Rude Cactus twice, and honestly it just seems like a silly little plug for my own site. I've provided links to other sites before when I've commented on posts and now that I've figured out how to do trackbacks have decided to do that, too, at least for now until someone tells me different. The thing I'm wondering is I just don't see a lot of trackbacks but I see a lot of other people commenting about other people's posts (and providing the links in their posts), isn't that good enough?

By the way I'm supposed to have trackback on this thing via Haloscan but it's not working. Hellloooooo Haloscan people I've posted on your forum twice please fix it. Or somebody please just tell me if I'm being silly and just completely missing it, because, really, I'd like to know.

Guess the Jellybeans, er, CDs

I wonder if Rude Cactus has managed to create an all time high number of comments on a blog post with this, or am I just new to blogging? Go check it out and don't forget to guess!

Trackbacks

So I'm wondering, are trackbacks a common thing around here? I've now pinged Rude Cactus twice, and honestly it just seems like a silly little plug for my own site. I've provided links to other sites before when I've commented on posts and now that I've figured out how to do trackbacks have decided to do that, too, at least for now until someone tells me different. The thing I'm wondering is I just don't see a lot of trackbacks but I see a lot of other people commenting about other people's posts (and providing the links in their posts), isn't that good enough?

By the way I'm supposed to have trackback on this thing via Haloscan but it's not working. Hellloooooo Haloscan people I've posted on your forum twice please fix it. Or somebody please just tell me if I'm being silly and just completely missing it, because, really, I'd like to know.

Guess the Jellybeans, er, CDs

I wonder if Rude Cactus has managed to create an all time high number of comments on a blog post with this, or am I just new to blogging? Go check it out and don't forget to guess!

Look Look!

Okay I couldn't resist, I found another reason to post. See my new flower up there by my title? I found an actual pink sun drop flower! It's actually called an evening primrose and "sometimes goes by the name of sun drop". Close enough for me! Isn't it purty? Now off for that reveling :) !

A Quiet Moment

My (potty-trained) little one is taking a nap, first one in days. Since I've been potty-training him I haven't wanted to give him a nap because I didn't want him to get frustrated about the whole thing if he had an "accident". Well now since he's staying dry during the nights I figure as long as he goes potty before hand he'll be okay. We'll see. I just did home-learning with my oldest, we had fun, we made a choo-choo train out of shapes cut out of construction paper, letters, and hidden pictures. I feel like I did so good :) . I love doing that stuff with him I am just sooo irregular about it, so to do it now, especially in the middle of this move is really n*i*c*e*. Now he's watching a movie rented from the library in the back room, so I actually have a moment of *peace* and *quiet* to myself. I think I'll just revel in it, ahhhhhhhhh.

Look Look!

Okay I couldn't resist, I found another reason to post. See my new flower up there by my title? I found an actual pink sun drop flower! It's actually called an evening primrose and "sometimes goes by the name of sun drop". Close enough for me! Isn't it purty? Now off for that reveling :) !

A Quiet Moment

My (potty-trained) little one is taking a nap, first one in days. Since I've been potty-training him I haven't wanted to give him a nap because I didn't want him to get frustrated about the whole thing if he had an "accident". Well now since he's staying dry during the nights I figure as long as he goes potty before hand he'll be okay. We'll see. I just did home-learning with my oldest, we had fun, we made a choo-choo train out of shapes cut out of construction paper, letters, and hidden pictures. I feel like I did so good :) . I love doing that stuff with him I am just sooo irregular about it, so to do it now, especially in the middle of this move is really n*i*c*e*. Now he's watching a movie rented from the library in the back room, so I actually have a moment of *peace* and *quiet* to myself. I think I'll just revel in it, ahhhhhhhhh.

Another Reason

I am wary of going back to where I grew up is that there is just something about family that tries to mire you down in who you used to be, or may still be a bit, but are trying not to be. Am I the only one here? I just feel so pressured and squeezed and poked and prodded into an old mold, an old form, not who I am anymore but still remember when I was that way so it's easy for me to feel like I am that way again. I am really dreading this aspect of being out there and hoping to find some tactful way to say "I don't appreciate you trying to bring me down by bringing up things that I used to do that you have no idea whether I may or may not do them anymore. Also, as family, such as a friend would do, you are there to love and support me, not tear me down, as I am here to do the same for you." Well that sounds kind and tactful enough, maybe I'll try that.

I would like to meet some people out there so that I can find that kind of support, even if it's not coming from my family, so hopefully I won't revert back to the things I used to be just because of the way they are or the things they say. And hopefully I can provide that for someone who's looking for that kind of support out there! I am near in tears here thinking of once again constantly being belittled for every mistake I make or even things that aren't mistakes but aren't perfect in the eyes of who is viewing them, or isn't something they would want or do, or maybe is something they would want or do but instead of being happy for me or congratulating me on it saying something mean or negatory just because they don't want it for me unless they can have it for themselves. And I'm not talking just about me here, I'm talking about my family, too, my two precious boys, and my hubby.

If any of my family ever does end up reading this which I'm sure they will eventually, I may delete this post, but better yet I hope that it will be an eye opener to the way that you treat family, that you really need to know that you are family for one reason and one reason alone, and that is to support and love each other.

I'll get off my soap box, now. I am hoping I can overcome this.

Another Reason

I am wary of going back to where I grew up is that there is just something about family that tries to mire you down in who you used to be, or may still be a bit, but are trying not to be. Am I the only one here? I just feel so pressured and squeezed and poked and prodded into an old mold, an old form, not who I am anymore but still remember when I was that way so it's easy for me to feel like I am that way again. I am really dreading this aspect of being out there and hoping to find some tactful way to say "I don't appreciate you trying to bring me down by bringing up things that I used to do that you have no idea whether I may or may not do them anymore. Also, as family, such as a friend would do, you are there to love and support me, not tear me down, as I am here to do the same for you." Well that sounds kind and tactful enough, maybe I'll try that.

I would like to meet some people out there so that I can find that kind of support, even if it's not coming from my family, so hopefully I won't revert back to the things I used to be just because of the way they are or the things they say. And hopefully I can provide that for someone who's looking for that kind of support out there! I am near in tears here thinking of once again constantly being belittled for every mistake I make or even things that aren't mistakes but aren't perfect in the eyes of who is viewing them, or isn't something they would want or do, or maybe is something they would want or do but instead of being happy for me or congratulating me on it saying something mean or negatory just because they don't want it for me unless they can have it for themselves. And I'm not talking just about me here, I'm talking about my family, too, my two precious boys, and my hubby.

If any of my family ever does end up reading this which I'm sure they will eventually, I may delete this post, but better yet I hope that it will be an eye opener to the way that you treat family, that you really need to know that you are family for one reason and one reason alone, and that is to support and love each other.

I'll get off my soap box, now. I am hoping I can overcome this.

September 11

Well I tried my first trackback today and it ended up not doing what I thought it was going to do. I realized they are more for informational purposes for others when you mention something about their posts more than to provide links in your own posts.

So this is what I was trying to link to... Please say a prayer for the families still experiencing the most pain from this.

September 11

Well I tried my first trackback today and it ended up not doing what I thought it was going to do. I realized they are more for informational purposes for others when you mention something about their posts more than to provide links in your own posts.

So this is what I was trying to link to... Please say a prayer for the families still experiencing the most pain from this.

More Tests Stop It Already!!

I think Pink Poppy and I are bad for each other. I had to do these only because the pictures were so pretty :) so here goes.


Wow... aren't we... enthousiastic? You are White
Chocolate. You can annoy people, but you're
sweet, caring, and quite nice to be around when
cheering up is needed.


What Kind of Chocolate are You?
brought to you by Quizilla

Yikes!! This one scares me!! Wouldn't my husband love that... only if the kids weren't around... *sigh*. Is putting this on my site going to send me all kinds of freaky people?? oh but doesn't that drink look Y*U*M*M*Y???


Congratulations! You're a screaming orgasm!! Kinky and fun, you know how to scream and you sure know how to have one hell of a party!! And one hell of a night . . .

What Drink Are You?
brought to you by Quizilla

Okay and the next is just WAYY too sexual I am NOT putting that on my site. WHAT the heck is this?!! I swear I answered correctly but I am definently not down with THAT, well one of the things anyway.

Now this one's not too bad...

The Thirties.


Which Decade Are You?
brought to you by Quizilla

and one more...

Which Silver Screen Siren are you?
brought to you by Quizilla

Bare Bones

My house is starting to look a little bit bare. In a way that's a good thing because it means I AM getting packed up and the things I love are getting packed up, but in another way it's starting to make me realize more and more I won't be here in a month.

Sweet Sleep

Well I was just telling Pink Poppy how I got NO sleep night before last and ended up getting a hotel to get some peace and quiet away from my hubby and little ones and slept for 3 hours. Then I brought pizza home and we all went swimming at the hotel afterwards. I should take naps at a hotel more often!

Random Comment: You know how when you're a parent, specifically a Mom, you never get to go to the restroom by yourself?
Me: Can you please leave me alone while I use the restroom?
Him: No (as he wads up a piece of toilet paper and throws it in the trash can) Score!

More Tests Stop It Already!!

I think Pink Poppy and I are bad for each other. I had to do these only because the pictures were so pretty :) so here goes.


Wow... aren't we... enthousiastic? You are White
Chocolate. You can annoy people, but you're
sweet, caring, and quite nice to be around when
cheering up is needed.


What Kind of Chocolate are You?
brought to you by Quizilla

Yikes!! This one scares me!! Wouldn't my husband love that... only if the kids weren't around... *sigh*. Is putting this on my site going to send me all kinds of freaky people?? oh but doesn't that drink look Y*U*M*M*Y???


Congratulations! You're a screaming orgasm!! Kinky and fun, you know how to scream and you sure know how to have one hell of a party!! And one hell of a night . . .

What Drink Are You?
brought to you by Quizilla

Okay and the next is just WAYY too sexual I am NOT putting that on my site. WHAT the heck is this?!! I swear I answered correctly but I am definently not down with THAT, well one of the things anyway.

Now this one's not too bad...

The Thirties.


Which Decade Are You?
brought to you by Quizilla

and one more...

Which Silver Screen Siren are you?
brought to you by Quizilla

Bare Bones

My house is starting to look a little bit bare. In a way that's a good thing because it means I AM getting packed up and the things I love are getting packed up, but in another way it's starting to make me realize more and more I won't be here in a month.

Sweet Sleep

Well I was just telling Pink Poppy how I got NO sleep night before last and ended up getting a hotel to get some peace and quiet away from my hubby and little ones and slept for 3 hours. Then I brought pizza home and we all went swimming at the hotel afterwards. I should take naps at a hotel more often!

Random Comment: You know how when you're a parent, specifically a Mom, you never get to go to the restroom by yourself?
Me: Can you please leave me alone while I use the restroom?
Him: No (as he wads up a piece of toilet paper and throws it in the trash can) Score!

Paradise Found

This is the town we'll be moving to. It is gorgeous isn't it?

Paradise Found

This is the town we'll be moving to. It is gorgeous isn't it?

Packing Up

Sidenote: I've had this post sitting here since yesterday. Something was up with Blogger and it wouldn't publish, they fixed it today so here it is!

I've ventured into the daunting task of actually packing for this cross country move. I have so many random thoughts so just bear with me.

Started packing a few days ago I started with my least used closet. That was pretty boring and of course thinking I'm going to move cross country with not a thread on me I wanted to hang on to every little thing. We're actually putting everything in storage here and getting all new furniture out there - we'll only have to worry about the bedrooms, the kitchen, living rooms, and laundry areas will all be stocked up. So that means that all we need to bring is the clothes on our back, some extra clothes, and some favorite things. Which is why starting in the guest room closet was a bad idea.

So today I started with the things I loved, packed most of them up for storage and kept one or two things that I love to take with figuring I can build my retreat around them. I also had the thought laying in bed last night that all this stuff is just CRAP. If I am going to yell at my babies over packing up this CRAP and get all stressed out about it then I should just throw all this CRAP away. Realizing that really put things into perspective. So today my babies helped me pack, and tape, and put boxes together. I did kind of have to put a stop to things when they had 10 boxes in their room and were having "boat races" - the 5 year old pushing the 2 year old around in a box - and the little one got run into a corner of the wall. So we'll just leave the box packing to Mommy and her helpers when she's got things going :) .

I am wondering, would I do this move if I would be as lonely as when we first moved out here? My family is back there so I am thinking that is somehow going to make it easier but I really don't think it is. We still need to have our own life as a family and I would think that would be hard to recreate no matter where you move. Even harder with other family around!! No offense, but everybody trying to give their opinion. One of the reasons we moved out here in the first place. It has been REALLY good for us, I'm just hoping we're strong enough to remain what we are even back near family (his and mine). Maybe I should ask Amber on this subject. Having moved 20 times in how many years? she's got to know something on this subject.

Packing Up

Sidenote: I've had this post sitting here since yesterday. Something was up with Blogger and it wouldn't publish, they fixed it today so here it is!

I've ventured into the daunting task of actually packing for this cross country move. I have so many random thoughts so just bear with me.

Started packing a few days ago I started with my least used closet. That was pretty boring and of course thinking I'm going to move cross country with not a thread on me I wanted to hang on to every little thing. We're actually putting everything in storage here and getting all new furniture out there - we'll only have to worry about the bedrooms, the kitchen, living rooms, and laundry areas will all be stocked up. So that means that all we need to bring is the clothes on our back, some extra clothes, and some favorite things. Which is why starting in the guest room closet was a bad idea.

So today I started with the things I loved, packed most of them up for storage and kept one or two things that I love to take with figuring I can build my retreat around them. I also had the thought laying in bed last night that all this stuff is just CRAP. If I am going to yell at my babies over packing up this CRAP and get all stressed out about it then I should just throw all this CRAP away. Realizing that really put things into perspective. So today my babies helped me pack, and tape, and put boxes together. I did kind of have to put a stop to things when they had 10 boxes in their room and were having "boat races" - the 5 year old pushing the 2 year old around in a box - and the little one got run into a corner of the wall. So we'll just leave the box packing to Mommy and her helpers when she's got things going :) .

I am wondering, would I do this move if I would be as lonely as when we first moved out here? My family is back there so I am thinking that is somehow going to make it easier but I really don't think it is. We still need to have our own life as a family and I would think that would be hard to recreate no matter where you move. Even harder with other family around!! No offense, but everybody trying to give their opinion. One of the reasons we moved out here in the first place. It has been REALLY good for us, I'm just hoping we're strong enough to remain what we are even back near family (his and mine). Maybe I should ask Amber on this subject. Having moved 20 times in how many years? she's got to know something on this subject.

Hehe

My hubby is sitting here being slightly irritated with me for blogging. He's still getting used to the idea that I've become a blogger, in his mind whatever that is. So he's standing in the kitchen getting ice cream waiting (patiently) for me to come watch a movie with him and he says, "Why don't you just blog off?" in a funny little cute voice like he means it.

Comments: Now with Email!!

Imagine that. I couldn't believe Blogspot didn't have an option to leave your email for comments so after an extensive search I found Haloscan, okay I really just borrowed the idea from Pink Poppy. She's my new friend much to her chagrin :) hehe, and if all my comments hadn't been deleted when I installed Haloscan you'd know what I was talking about. Long story short, my BBC Personality test sent her on a long, healthy I'm sure, procrastinating trip through the world of mind tests.

ANY way all this to say now you can enter your email and, lo and behold, your homepage when you leave comments on my site (please, please :). However all of your previous comments have been lost in the great big blog universe. Supposedly I can get them back somehow but since I've only just started in the blogosphere I didn't have that many and I figure from now on they WILL be there. Only I really did like all the comments I had *pout* :(

Potty Training Update

Okay Pink Poppy here's the update! So far so GOOD - can you believe it?!! He's been going in there all day - 2 accidents today I think?? There were 3 yesterday. He's a big pooper, I think he's pooped in there 3-5 times already today, I know it's crazy. But it is definently MUCH nicer even in the potty chair than in the diaper. We went to buy diapers last night but purposefully bought just a little bit so we could use them for night time LOL. Some people say to not use diapers at night time because it confuses them. And I didn't with my first. But I think that every kid is different and I'm thinking I'm not about to let him get all frustrated waking up wet in the mornings, plus you know the whole cleaning up after it deal. We'll see how it goes, I'll keep you posted!

9/10/04 Update: It's in the final clearing stages. We're going on one or maybe two accidents a day and even underwear during the night. WHOOHOO!! Doing the happy dance, oh yeah!

Hehe

My hubby is sitting here being slightly irritated with me for blogging. He's still getting used to the idea that I've become a blogger, in his mind whatever that is. So he's standing in the kitchen getting ice cream waiting (patiently) for me to come watch a movie with him and he says, "Why don't you just blog off?" in a funny little cute voice like he means it.

Comments: Now with Email!!

Imagine that. I couldn't believe Blogspot didn't have an option to leave your email for comments so after an extensive search I found Haloscan, okay I really just borrowed the idea from Pink Poppy. She's my new friend much to her chagrin :) hehe, and if all my comments hadn't been deleted when I installed Haloscan you'd know what I was talking about. Long story short, my BBC Personality test sent her on a long, healthy I'm sure, procrastinating trip through the world of mind tests.

ANY way all this to say now you can enter your email and, lo and behold, your homepage when you leave comments on my site (please, please :). However all of your previous comments have been lost in the great big blog universe. Supposedly I can get them back somehow but since I've only just started in the blogosphere I didn't have that many and I figure from now on they WILL be there. Only I really did like all the comments I had *pout* :(

Potty Training Update

Okay Pink Poppy here's the update! So far so GOOD - can you believe it?!! He's been going in there all day - 2 accidents today I think?? There were 3 yesterday. He's a big pooper, I think he's pooped in there 3-5 times already today, I know it's crazy. But it is definently MUCH nicer even in the potty chair than in the diaper. We went to buy diapers last night but purposefully bought just a little bit so we could use them for night time LOL. Some people say to not use diapers at night time because it confuses them. And I didn't with my first. But I think that every kid is different and I'm thinking I'm not about to let him get all frustrated waking up wet in the mornings, plus you know the whole cleaning up after it deal. We'll see how it goes, I'll keep you posted!

9/10/04 Update: It's in the final clearing stages. We're going on one or maybe two accidents a day and even underwear during the night. WHOOHOO!! Doing the happy dance, oh yeah!

First Five Things

Rude Cactus had this up - rather than stick it all up on his comments I thought I'd post mine here, so here you go!

List the first 5 things that come to mind for all 5 categories.

1. Electric
2. Kid's Books You Liked
3. Having Fun
4. Green
5. September

My Answers:

1. Electric: Car those new hybrid things, saw one on the road the other day and was discussing with a friend how they probably have tons of those out in Cali.
2. Kid's Books You Liked: Andy and the Lion, only because it's a book I vaguely remember from childhood and now my kids have it.
3. Having Fun: Party!! Nothing like a good party! I'm thinking BBQ, or out dancing with the girls.
4. Green: Sage, I love sage green for home decorating. Love it, love it, love it!
5. September: Today, moving all in one month. ARGH!!

LOL Guess I didn't read very carefully either Heather! Okay here goes again...

1. Electric: Car, piano, guitar (only cuz of Rude Cactus), light, wiring
2. Kid's Books You Liked: Andy and the Lion, Just Plain Fancy, Alfie Books, Dr. Seuss, Beatrix Potter
3. Having Fun: Reading, BBQing, Dancing, Playing with my Kiddos, Out in Nature with my Family
4. Green: Sage, mini golf carpeting, the spray bottle sitting next to me on my desk, the first poops that babies have (sorry!! it was one of the first things that came to mind!!), mountains covered in trees
5. September: Today, moving all in one month, overwhelmed, packing, decluttering

First Five Things

Rude Cactus had this up - rather than stick it all up on his comments I thought I'd post mine here, so here you go!

List the first 5 things that come to mind for all 5 categories.

1. Electric
2. Kid's Books You Liked
3. Having Fun
4. Green
5. September

My Answers:

1. Electric: Car those new hybrid things, saw one on the road the other day and was discussing with a friend how they probably have tons of those out in Cali.
2. Kid's Books You Liked: Andy and the Lion, only because it's a book I vaguely remember from childhood and now my kids have it.
3. Having Fun: Party!! Nothing like a good party! I'm thinking BBQ, or out dancing with the girls.
4. Green: Sage, I love sage green for home decorating. Love it, love it, love it!
5. September: Today, moving all in one month. ARGH!!

LOL Guess I didn't read very carefully either Heather! Okay here goes again...

1. Electric: Car, piano, guitar (only cuz of Rude Cactus), light, wiring
2. Kid's Books You Liked: Andy and the Lion, Just Plain Fancy, Alfie Books, Dr. Seuss, Beatrix Potter
3. Having Fun: Reading, BBQing, Dancing, Playing with my Kiddos, Out in Nature with my Family
4. Green: Sage, mini golf carpeting, the spray bottle sitting next to me on my desk, the first poops that babies have (sorry!! it was one of the first things that came to mind!!), mountains covered in trees
5. September: Today, moving all in one month, overwhelmed, packing, decluttering

Asshole/Bitch Test

Either I have too much time on my hands today or I just don't want to do anything. It's the latter I swear. This is from Beach House Rules found via Amber's site.

I AM 26% ASSHOLE/BITCH! I may think I am an asshole or a bitch, but the truth is I am a good person at heart. Yeah sure, I can have a mean streak in me, but most of the people I meet like me. Take the ASSHOLE/BITCH test

Overwhelmed

I've been escaping on the computer today. My house is a mess and I have yet to start packing. My hubby brought home boxes but left them outside and now teeny tiny BITING ants are all over them. *sigh* so I have to wait more boxes. I am wanting to just pack up ONE box so I feel like I have SOMEthing done and it's not gonna hit me like a truck in 3 weeks!!

Oh yeah and I'm crash potty training my 2 year old because we ran out of DIAPERS!! How sad is that?! LOL

Blogger Forum

Here's a forum just for bloggers, compliments of Patriot Paradox.

Asshole/Bitch Test

Either I have too much time on my hands today or I just don't want to do anything. It's the latter I swear. This is from Beach House Rules found via Amber's site.

I AM 26% ASSHOLE/BITCH! I may think I am an asshole or a bitch, but the truth is I am a good person at heart. Yeah sure, I can have a mean streak in me, but most of the people I meet like me. Take the ASSHOLE/BITCH test

Overwhelmed

I've been escaping on the computer today. My house is a mess and I have yet to start packing. My hubby brought home boxes but left them outside and now teeny tiny BITING ants are all over them. *sigh* so I have to wait more boxes. I am wanting to just pack up ONE box so I feel like I have SOMEthing done and it's not gonna hit me like a truck in 3 weeks!!

Oh yeah and I'm crash potty training my 2 year old because we ran out of DIAPERS!! How sad is that?! LOL

Blogger Forum

Here's a forum just for bloggers, compliments of Patriot Paradox.

Personality Test

Found this via Fast Eddies Bullet. Check it out here. Here's my results, pretty close on:

Your answers suggest you are a Nurturer

The four aspects that make up this personality type are:

Summary of Nurturers

• Care for the important people in their lives
• Strive for harmony and avoid confrontation
• Think of themselves as gentle, conscientious, and mature
• May have trouble making decisions that could hurt others

More about Nurturers

Nurturers are quiet people who believe in order and diligently look after the people they care about. They focus on the needs of others and establish routines to help them meet their commitments.

Nurturers are the most likely group to say they prefer a job where the same thing happens every day, according to a UK survey.

Nurturers remember details that are important to them, such as their friends' birthdays and anniversaries. People with this personality type value others' feelings and may challenge behaviour they think is insensitive.

In situations where they can't use their talents or are unappreciated, Nurturers may feel bitter and seek support by complaining to their colleagues. Under extreme stress, Nurturers may become preoccupied with the worst possible outcome and believe that they are heading for disaster.

Because they are so caring and loyal, Nurturers run the risk of being taken advantage of.

Nurturer Careers

Nurturers are often drawn to jobs that allow them to help others.

Personality Test

Found this via Fast Eddies Bullet. Check it out here. Here's my results, pretty close on:

Your answers suggest you are a Nurturer

The four aspects that make up this personality type are:

Summary of Nurturers

• Care for the important people in their lives
• Strive for harmony and avoid confrontation
• Think of themselves as gentle, conscientious, and mature
• May have trouble making decisions that could hurt others

More about Nurturers

Nurturers are quiet people who believe in order and diligently look after the people they care about. They focus on the needs of others and establish routines to help them meet their commitments.

Nurturers are the most likely group to say they prefer a job where the same thing happens every day, according to a UK survey.

Nurturers remember details that are important to them, such as their friends' birthdays and anniversaries. People with this personality type value others' feelings and may challenge behaviour they think is insensitive.

In situations where they can't use their talents or are unappreciated, Nurturers may feel bitter and seek support by complaining to their colleagues. Under extreme stress, Nurturers may become preoccupied with the worst possible outcome and believe that they are heading for disaster.

Because they are so caring and loyal, Nurturers run the risk of being taken advantage of.

Nurturer Careers

Nurturers are often drawn to jobs that allow them to help others.

Back from the Blue

Sorry my computer went out on me so I've been in the dark for a week or two. Not that it was a bad thing. I find sometimes I need a major break from the computer, otherwise I just end up spending ALL my time on it when really I could be doing other much more productive things than, say, searching for antique child chairs on eBay that I probably won't ever end up buying because the shipping gets too ridiculous.

It's happening!! Wow. Where do I start?? Can you imagine the stuff you have to do when you're moving across the country? Phone, PO Box, DSL, storage, speech therapy for my kid, insurance, current work notice, not to mention renting out our home. Actually when I put it that way it doesn't seem like .... so .... much. Crazy. So far I've gotten the phone, DSL, and storage or scheduled to be set up any way. And the PO Box on it's way to being set up.

Back from the Blue

Sorry my computer went out on me so I've been in the dark for a week or two. Not that it was a bad thing. I find sometimes I need a major break from the computer, otherwise I just end up spending ALL my time on it when really I could be doing other much more productive things than, say, searching for antique child chairs on eBay that I probably won't ever end up buying because the shipping gets too ridiculous.

It's happening!! Wow. Where do I start?? Can you imagine the stuff you have to do when you're moving across the country? Phone, PO Box, DSL, storage, speech therapy for my kid, insurance, current work notice, not to mention renting out our home. Actually when I put it that way it doesn't seem like .... so .... much. Crazy. So far I've gotten the phone, DSL, and storage or scheduled to be set up any way. And the PO Box on it's way to being set up.