Tuesday, March 13, 2007

Nervous as all heck

Tomorrow I have a counseling appointment. I've been wanting to set one up for well over a year but haven't had the guts to do it. I want to deal with issues I have that affect my relationships with others, mainly my hubby, and to realize what I'm doing that's tearing down rather than building up that I may not even be aware of!! A year later, and many, many conversations with couples that are good friends where the girl has gone through counseling, then the guy and girl together who have said how good it's been for them and made me feel better about it, I've finally made the appointment. Funny thing is right now I'm in a REALLY good space. Last month? Not so much. It might be a good thing because I'll be able to talk more objectively about when things DO seem so darn hard. In the meantime I'm nervous about what the heck I'm going to talk about!

Update: It went great! He was wonderful, unlike any. other. guy. I know which is a good thing for me. I blabbered on and he made sense out of my strung together sentences in a way I completely did not say but meant. He brought up a few theories he's been developing for a new book he's writing and said he wanted to hear my history over the next few times so he's not assuming anything and then discuss some of these theories. I loved how he talked about a relationship with God and Scripture in casual conversation. He was really encouraging of me being there even though I wasn't in crisis mode, mentioning that we can always bring those issues up, that people think they have to have a gun to their head, but that's not the case. He really validated the fact that I could live a better life than my parents - not that they live a bad life. I'm excited to actually become a better mom and a better wife, and hopefully not DAMAGE my kiddos. I'm really excited about working on some of those issues!



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