Friday, July 28, 2006

Letting Go

So I just spent the last hour crying my eyes out and releasing all the anger that I have with my Ipod blasting in my ears so I couldn't hear myself cry.

This has nothing to do with what I was crying about, but I want to write it so I remember. Do you ever wonder sometimes how people do what they do? I'll tell you how we do what we do. We don't. We live on borrowed money. Borrowed time. Lots of it. From the bank, not from our parents. From God. In addition to not to be requited help from our parents. We've dug ourselves a hole while building a house on top of it. The goal is to fill the hole.

Starting your own business in the midst of a family and two teenagers who had to grow up without a seconds thought of adolescent life and clinging on to that family for the sake of it not falling apart is not easy. It's important. Not easy.

Brando & I are just starting out our marriage together. Up until this point we have been banging out the details of being a family. Now we're figuring out how to be a couple. In the midst of him figuring out how to be a man. It's amazing and frightening, rewarding and consequential all at the same time. We argue, we fight. Not like we used to. Now we do the heated discussions. We roll over and go to sleep. We ask to talk on the couch another time when we're not so heated. We enjoy the family when we have the opportunity. In the meantime we work on us. As individuals and together.


Courtney said...

Beautiful post... big hugs.

my life is brilliant said...

I totally agree with Courtney. I'm sorry I'm getting to this post late. I hope you feel better now. Sometimes a girl just needs to cry!

Cecilia said...

...and I'm getting to it even later. You're doing well, sweetie. The title already said it. All's well. xoxo


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