Dropped

not quite off the face of the earth. Things are super busy so I'll be back when I can...

*B's Mom and brother are here

*B's brother is moving into our same apartment building

*My neighbor and friend had her baby girl yesterday two weeks early

*I spent the last day of my parent's visit here this weekend all day at the hospital with her

*J's 7th birthday is today. Happy Birthday Sweetie!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

*His party is this weekend.

*I have no idea when my MIL will be headed back home.

*I have about 22 and a half emails to return.

*People are emailing me again to make sure I got their first email.

*My nephew is over to help the boys put their new legos from Oma together.

*I went out to Target and got four new pairs of shoes. This is one of them.



*Now we're going to the pool.

Nothing Like

...the smile on J's face as him and his cousin K's face as they smile over eating J's birthday cake together

...the hug S gives Grandpa out of the blue at the dinner table

...spending a whole day of shopping with my Mom and my sister - at a Tanger Outlet center no less

...climbing in a van full of dirty, stinky boys who went fishing all morning long with Grandpa and Daddy

...hearing how K said today was the funnest day

...getting a new wardrobe including trendy items I'm usually too timid to get but splurged on today

...Rocky Mountain Chocolate Factory Peanut Butter Caramel Apples and Chocolate Fudge

...driving in a storm with white knuckles gripping the steering wheel, watching lightning all around and hitting a puddle that splashes as high as your car

...dinner at the Olive Garden with the noisiest most loving family in the world

...freshening up in the car beforehand with my new Hurley strapless beaded top

...watching two very tired tuckered boys fall asleep within minutes

...one other should be very tired tuckered out boy crawl in bed with us and fall asleep then

My Amazing Husband

In the last year at least four different wives or girlfriends have described him as amazing and their significant others have mentioned that they want them to be like B. One of their husbands told his wife when B’s around he feels bad because he’s so wonderful he feels like a horrible husband. Another said you just want me to be like B. It makes me CRACK UP every time I hear it again. The thing is, I don’t ever talk bad about him, and I always have amazing things to say about him, but anyone can say that about their significant other. They see it when they see not only how wonderful he is around us, but how he treats them and everyone else around him. He treats all the people the same like they all deserve the same amount of respect and admiration for the people that they are. That is so incredible for me and makes me sit back and just be so grateful that God had him for me.

And, baby, this is your birthday post I wanted to write but never did. Happy Birthday sweetie, you are my amazing 25 year old man and I love you with everything God has given me.

Nightfox

Remember the Nightfox's laser dance song from Ocean's Twelve that's not on the soundtrack went? I LOVE that song. And I couldn't find it anywhere!! Well I finally found it. Free. And in Itunes format. It's The a La Menthe from Nikkfurie De La Caution by Kourtrajme and you can download it free here from the artist.

My Break

It might not be apparent here but I have been on major burnout lately. I went through a tough period of completely losing my focus and came through that fighting out of the ring. But the burnout stuck around. B finally noticed what was going on and strongly suggested I take a break. He validated me by making me aware of the fact I've been homeschooling for going on four years now, starting when J first started all his speech stuff. I worked through the summer in California last year, subscribing to the feeling I needed to make up for what we had missed. Well no more! I am on a BREAK. And this only my second week. Break, in this instance, means ABSOLUTELY NO SCHOOL. Yay! And the fun thing is... the kids seem to be learning just as much or more without it ; ) .

Last week we went to the park three times, got together for three playdates, the pool twice, a one hour walk once, and made cookies. This week so far we've gotten together for playdates three times, had friends over at our house for the first time (with kids)!!!, checked out an organic farm in South Austin where we fed chickens carrot tops and picked strawberries, attended an orientation for chess club for J that we'll start next week, stayed in our pajamas all day once, and made peanut butter cookies once. I feel like a Mom again and that I have a relationship with my kids again!!! I am LOVIN' it.

Not to mention all the bubble baths I've taken. I have to clarify, I hate bubble baths. Well I did. Until I started taking this break. The second day I was taking a shower and just had this overwhelming feeling of wanting to sink down into the tub, it was a feeling of utter exhaustion and giving up. I finished my shower, started the bath and bubbles, got my bath pillow and a stack of washcloths so I can dry whatever needed to touch things that couldn't get wet, lit my candles, grabbed my magazine and sunk in. When I was done I felt renewed and refreshed, like everything had been washed away. Every time I've gotten that feeling of wanting to sink in since I've done it. And I absolutely LOVE it. I've been able to catch up reading my magazines, do my Bible study - although that one I won't do in there again it was too uncomfortable to write, and pretty soon I'll have to start on books since I'm almost done with my magazines. I only have two that I read each month, but I have to read them cover to cover before I consider myself done. I've been LOVIN' it.

My anger... has been so nil it hasn't even been funny. The boys, who wrestle all day every day, when it gets too much for me instead of fighting the battle of trying to get them to go take quiet time on their beds I just turn up my Ipod, stick it in my ears, and take my quiet time away. The recipe J made to make cookies that he taped to a kitchen cabinet we've made twice. That was one of those things I used to do when they were littler, always want to do now but after everything else don't have the energy for. Now I do. Playdates were another thing that always went on the back burner. Now they're on the front burner. The kids get to know their friends and feel like they have friends and the fun thing about playdates so far, is that they're not just fun for the kids, the Mom and I get to have a good time talking too!

J is going to that school we'd talkeda bout twice a week next year for four hours each and I can't wait to have the time with S to just be and discover who he is. I hope I will take moments like these to enjoy being with him. I'm so glad my husband had the wisdom to perceive that, and to present it in a way that I feel like I've done enough to actually deserve a break cuz this break has been the BEST thing for me.

About the Previous Post...

Wow. That was really hard for me to talk about. And it brought tears to my eyes to read over it again. Those are some tough times we've been through and I am so thankful for every moment of them that brought us to here.

A Comment Turned into a Post...

Normally these are not things I would post about, I try to keep most of B's and I relationship out this realm of blogosphering, but there has been so much SEX talk I wanted to put in my 2 cents and it wouldn't fit in a comment : ) . So this is for you, GFF, and Allison, and Dazed, who I have not had the fortune of reading enough.

I am definently NOT as open about sex as GFF, but I used to be a freak about it. Wanted it ALL the time. Well my hubs kind of changed that. And it's been a really good lesson in discipline for me, and finding out why I felt like I needed it so much. After the marriage conference we went to just a bit ago it released some of those apprehensions I'd always had about sex being "bad" or "dirty" to talk about and I don't discuss it with red cheeks anymore. Before I met B I was a crazy girl, but with B I told him I couldn't be that way otherwise I knew I would leave him - I had left all the other guys because I knew that wasn't what I was truly looking for. He somehow had the character to say no even when I begged for it. We DID do other things though and - from the skewed religious perspective - I didn't realize those things are included in the ultimate intimate experience, so I really can't say what I would do if I were single again. I do know that I WISH I had done it differently. The issues that my husband and I have had to work through on past hurts and relationships with each other have not been worth the having them in the first place. Our sexual lives have been a place of exploration with each other. Just a year or two ago we feel like we were able to begin with a fresh start - the past had finally been wiped away, dealt with, argued over, and come to terms with. Then we started anew. It has been a blissful two years of learning each others patterns and letting go of past expectations, ending with that marriage conference beginning our own personal world of passion in sexual intimacy.

Wow. That was really hard for me to talk about. And it brought tears to my eyes to read over it again. Those are some tough times we've been through and I am so thankful for every moment of them that brought us to here.

Super Relaxing Weekend

It was pure family.

I can't remember what we did Friday evening, but that's when it started when B said he was taking Saturday off. My plans adjusted to include him, and they did wonderfully. We stayed up til' 3am watching movies and playing games and woke up bright and early on Saturday at 9am to get J to his trial ice skating class at the rink by 11:10am. We got there right at 11:10am and he ended up being the only kid there for the trial class. So he had a private lesson. The coach was blown away by him. I told him he's only been a few times, and everything he asked J to do he did. I think he probably did about 4 lessons right then because he was so impressed how well he was doing.

Afterwards we headed downtown to Festival Beach for this years Dragon Boat Festival. The boats were so neat, with ornate dragonheads on the front and scales painted on the sides. They had some noteworthy teams there - Dell had two, Samsung had one, and the Austin Police Dept. had one. Those guys and girls were BUFF on their upper arms. We never really found out who won, but I think Dell won one and I'm pretty sure the APD won one as well. We walked around the park for a bit and watched some karate and asian shows they were putting on. Dell was giving away free water, and they had free Chinese food (yum!) but we'd already ate so we passed on that.



We headed home and stopped by HEB for BBQ supplies and came home and barbequed by the pool. The kids splashed around for a half an hour and I read my InStyle magazine to B and we ended up coming home to eat before dark set in. The kids went to bed and B and I settled in for another night of movies and games. This time we only stayed up til 2am : ) .

Sunday we went to church and checked out the class for college age adults class, as B's brother is going to be moving here next week and wants to get involved in our church with us. They seemed like an energetic group and I loved their music so much I wanted to go!

After church we came back to our pool with our nephews and lazed around for a bit. I dragged a lounge chair into the one and a half foot area just enough so the I was lounging in a few inches of water and basked in the sun.

We met up with 3 other couples from our class for dinner at 4:30pm at a super fun place where the kids could play at the playground they had. My nephews were there, so one of them hung out with them outside which was really nice. It was fun to meet these people - one of them is pregnant and due next month and having a midwife. It was so fun to chat with someone who is going through that experience, so few people around here seem to. At least here up in North Austin, according to her South Austin is full of people who use midwives. Another lady was pregnant and due next week, she teaches the Spanish class at the place J will be attending school next year so it was fun to meet with her.



We didn't get out of there til' 7pm so we came home and settled in for... yup, another night of games and movies. Only this time we watched our Pastor from our Californian church on B's computer ahead of time with the boys. If you don't get a chance to get to church and want to listen to some really practical stuff, this guy is great and he's hilarious! And his sermons are podcast! Whatever that means I don't know, but I do know B downloads it on his computer. So we tucked the boys in bed and discussed our plans for the week. I made a quick run to the store with the neighbor's cute little dog who was missing his mommy for ice cream and reese's and we settled in for Dante's Peak and more games.

Did I mention I've taken three bubble baths, maybe four, in the last week? This break has been oh so good for me. Heh. I don't think I even mentioned I've been taking a break... I think I'll save that for another post.