Moments of My Week

I love seeing other people's Instagram feed posts, so I thought I'd do my own. These are from the last two weekends and this last week.

 

1. Being 'pinned' by my Star Scout. SO PROUD OF HIM.

2. Breakfast made by my boys and I - Shawners made blueberry and chocolate chip pancakes, Justinbustin made oven-baked bacon, and I made the eggs.

3. Sunday brunch and shopping date with my man

4. Flowers from two separate occasions from my man -

the small one while we were on a date, and the gerberas just because

5. Black Forest and white chocolate raspberry macarons at La Patisserie with Mai

6. Strawberries and cupcake wine on a lazy Sunday afternoon

7. Valentine's chocolate strawberry cupcakes from Lick It Bite It or Both

8. And last but not least, puppy chow made with Shawners - he hasn't forgotten about it after Ashley gave us puppy chow in Arizona

I Do, Part Two

Would it be too much for me to ask you for a moment of silence? Let's just take a moment to celebrate the incredulous amount of work that goes into being married for TEN YEARS. Those of you who can say it with me, leave a shout out here. I've always wondered how people can stay together for 10, 15, 20 years then decide they made the wrong decision and move on. The thought no longer keeps me up at night. Every relationship, every friendship, every thing worth having takes work.

When do you know it's too much work? You don't. You work, based on faith, and when the other person has completely warped, twisted, smashed, jumped up and down on your faith, that's when you know. How do you see the warning signs? You don't. Especially when you have a lot of faith.

Fortunately for me, but perhaps unfortunately for Brando, I don't have that much faith, which means I am hoping I am not overlooking any red flags. Brando, on the other hand, has the most trusting amount of faith one has ever seen in every single soul he meets. Hopefully, he's not overlooking any red flags.

Speaking of his faith in every single soul he meets, here are my vows to the man I love:

Brando, ten years ago we had no clue what we were doing and we still don't, but I'm glad we're figuring it out together. When I met you, you seemed so sure of yourself - like you had the world on your shoulders, only it didn't weigh you down.

Through the years - in sickness and in health, for richer or for broke - you have been by my side. I can stand here and truly say thru all the ups and downs in my life you have been my steady horizon - my friend, my love, the one who has faith in me when it feels like no else but God does.

In all of figuring out who I am, you have stayed right where you are - in case I get lost I know where to find you. God put you in my life and every day I am SO grateful. I'm excited to go thru this next phase of our lives together, excited to see what it brings.

Brando, I have fallen even more in love with you since the day we met. I loved you when I married you, but I've fallen in love with you since then because of you and all that you are. You are my horizon, my anchor, my captain when seas are rough,

the hand that reaches out for me when mine is trembling, my friend, my fellow adventurer, discovering new places and new things, my companion figuring out the nuances of life, the solid rock of a father to my children, and the man that every time I look at I fall in love with all over again.

This day means so much more to me than this day ten years ago. Not only do we have the friends and family standing by that have supported us, loved us, and saved us thru out the years, but we have each other, these two precious men standing next to us, and ten years worth of memories together.

Today, I reaffirm my commitment to you, only this time in the presence of family and friends who first showed us how to love, helped us grow, and supported us when we found each other. In the presence of these witnesses I once again promise to love, honor you, and comfort you, in sickness and in health, for richer, for poorer, for better and for worse, as long as we both shall live.(1)

I do, just like I did then, with every fibre of my being. I can't wait for the next 10 years, then 20, then 30, 40, 50..."

(1) Thanks to the always helpful about dot com for helping me find the perfect wording to include the precious people who attended that were not there the first time due to the small nature of our wedding.

Brando, master of saying what needs to be said in many less words than I, wrote these out and read them to me on the day of our vow renewal:

Rose, ten years ago about twenty-five yards from here, I asked if I can keep you.

I was lucky enough for the most beautiful bride in the world to say yes.

Today, with you in front of me, I am here to ask you again.

I am here to renew my commitment to have you and to hold you, in sickness and in health, in good times and bad, for richer or for poorer (or broke!), for better or for worse, until death do us part.

To kiss you with passion even when we are watching TV,

to dance with you more often

and to continue growing as individuals, together,

while we raise our two wonderful children.

*My first name and last name*, can I keep you another ten years and every year thereafter?

My obvious answer was yes, just like the first time.

As I typed out our vows here, it struck me how perfectly the pictures coordinated with our words, albeit completely unintentionally. Our friend, Celeste Duran, was our amazing photographer, who, if she's not already, should be an award winning photographer. She definitely wins the award in my book for Incredibly Capturing the Moment and the award for Effortlessly Creating New Memories as she shoots. She operates out of Santa Cruz, California, but also does destination weddings and shoots.

Summertime Mealtime

After having Brando's friend Big Shawners grocery shop for us, then come home and slave in our kitchen for four hours making three delicious meals for us that lasted us all week, and then hearing Allison rave again about her delicious meals made in advance for the entire week, I finally decided I would do it myself. After Big Shawners wasn't available to come over tonight and do it again, that is.

So, tonight, Brando and I grocery shopped and slaved for four hours to make three (hopefully all) delicious meals that will hopefully last us the week. Grocery shopping together was a BLAST, especially sending the boys in all different directions to get ingredients (out of the whole list, I'm pretty sure Brando and I only got two items ourselves), coming home and all four of us putting all the ingredients together - washing, chopping, putting together, all the while I was making the ingredients pretty in their own individual bowls whilst Brando made fun of me,

and then finally, FINALLY eating my delicious plate of chicken, red pepper, and onion kabobs marinated in soy sauce, honey, and olive oil with fresh green beans, cherry tomatoes, olive oil, and basil.

So excited for beef bourgouignon with red wine, carrots, and onions,

asparagus with fresh squeezed lime and garlic,

rosemary potatoes,

and goat cheese, basil, and bread crumb stuffed tomatoes.

ph. by Brando (except for the 3rd ph.), unedited because I stole them too quickly

You had me at hello

I didn't mean to disappear. As Brando put it, now that I have a say in where I live for the first time in five years, I guess I just don't feel the need to escape anymore. That includes escaping to fun and interesting new getaways, events, and restaurants. Oh, don't worry, I'm still enjoying those things, but they're not the center of my life like they were for awhile. I'm enjoying my man, my boys, and (eek) home.

I'll be back soon though to show you a glimpse into my home. Floating at Barton Springs, long days at the pool, dates to see Jeff Dunham, friends' birthday celebrations, girls nights, volunteering, picnics at Zilker Hillside Theatre before Ballet Under the Stars, the list goes on amongst the every day wonders of teaching my boys to get along as siblings, summer youth group events for Justinbustin, enjoying dinners with my family, watching tv shows late into the night with Brando, and family movie nights.. Just give me a moment to enjoy this moment. Talk to you soon!

I don't know, something amazing I guess

At any one point in time something amazing is happening in the world. This weekend I have been so grateful for my something amazing happening right here, right now in my own quiet little world. It doesn't appear to be amazing to the outside world, or to me even. It being time with my family, my amazing hubby who bends over backwards for me doing everything I shouldn't be doing, the massage he scheduled not once, not twice, but three times simply because I didn't feel up to going to the first two appointment times he had scheduled, the movies and treats he ran out to get, the massages he gave me, the plans he made with the boys, the outings he planned with all of us. These are truly precious to me. I'm glad I had a whole weekend where I was literally forced to sit back and experience them. A small piece of what my life would be without me making the plans and dictating what we do, just sitting back and enjoying. I love the amazing, too, and can not WAIT to get back to it, but I have so enjoyed the quiet amazing this weekend.

As far as being literally forced to enjoy the weekend, or actually four day vacation (yay, Brando!), going to the chiro literally made my back so bad I woke up in tears the next morning and was heavily drugged for the next two days just to bear the pain. The original pain is gone I think unless the all over back pain that replaced it once I went to the chiro is drowning out the original pain. It has slowly gotten better by taking muscle relaxants and not doing ANYthing to make it worse and I'm so hoping it will heal completely soon!

The title quote is for Sami... can anyone guess where it came from?

Perfect 4th

Starting the day off right by going to the pool in the morning with chips and dip,

eating at our favorite place for lunch, finding a quiet spot to listen to the A*stin Symphony Orcestra and watch the fireworks,

letting our shady grassy spot fill up with people around us, but not in our bubble, bringing appetizers over from Ho*ters, watching the fireworks over the A*stin skyline (we're definitely doing that again! Our spot was fabulous but we already have mapped out several new spots to try),

Photo by Brando

having a dance party in the car while waiting to get out of the parking garage, floating in the pool with Land Sharks at midnight when we got home. A perfect beginning, middle, and end to enjoying fireworks, independence, and the ones I love. Hope you had a wonderful day as well!

Family Night

I had to laugh last night when Jillian asked me if it was just me and my boys or if I had a man, too. Granted she only discovered our group, and thus my blog, a few days ago and had only known me for an hour. But, still, it made me laugh. It also made me think back on how this blog has evolved with me. When I first started all I had to post about was my kids, and my hubby. And post about them I did. From family weekends to homeschool days to dinner at night. That was my life. Not anymore. Since about three years ago this blog followed me from being a stay at home mom going to a working mom. From being a shy, insecure girl to being a bold, firm, woman. Okay I'm not THAT bold and THAT firm, but a hell of a lot more firm and bold than I used to be and I darn well will say what I need and want to say when I need and want to say it. I rarely mention my kids and my hubby anymore because they don't define me. That doesn't mean I love them any less. I love them more, actually! I am so happy as a person (usually, except when I go thru changes and have to fight my way thru being depressed back to the happy person I am!!) that I have so much more to give back to them. At the end of the day, at the beginning of the day, in between. I'm still cranky sometimes, but I don't take it out on them that they're all I give to so why should I be treated this way! I don't give everything to them anymore. I give a lot to me. I give a lot to my hubby. And I give a lot to my kids. But I make darn well sure that I am taken care of first. 

Well, I didn't mean to get all philosophical on you. I actually meant to tell you about my evening, sort of to prove this point. We got home this afternoon after a doctor's appointment where I found out Justinb has chiggers and a bad allergic reaction to them - not poison ivy, like I originally thought. Thank God! The boys did their chores, cleaned their room, drew me pictures,

played sweetly as all heck for two hours in their room with their legos and snorkel gear (um, yes, that's not a typo) AND their door closed. Hallelujah, quietness! Then their friend came to the door and asked if they could play and off they went to play baseball upstairs. I oh so very domestically made some artichokes for an afternoon snack (mostly because artichokes and avocados are the only two veggies Shawners will eat) and took them upstairs along with my iced coffee to watch them play. Before I went up there I called my good friend JenH to see if she wanted to sit out there and watch them with me. She brought her own iced coffee and sat and chatted with me for a good hour while our boys played baseball. Later, one of her boys spotted Justinb's teacher, Jo, driving up to her place. So I texted Jo to see if she wanted to join us. She texted back "On my way!" and brought cherries along with her. We chatted for the next hour before Brando got home and joined us for another hour. We didn't end up coming in until 7:30pm when I made pan-seared sirloin and rice pilaf for dinner, with angel food shortcake and strawberries for dessert. So there's my undomesticated domesticated girlie life that I absolutely love.

Dinnertime Conversations

For Christmas my sister gave me one of the best gifts I have ever received. It's a circle shaped tin with a stack of cards inside with a picture of a penny on one side and on the other side a conversation starter to help parents and young children connect. It's called Penny for your Thoughts. For the past six months, every time we have sat down to dinner we have pulled this out at the end of dinner and spent twenty to thirty minutes chatting over five to ten questions.

Here are tonight's Penny for your Thoughts' inspired conversations:

"Name 3 blessings in your life."

Justinb: A good education, parents, and the opportunity to go to college.

Shawners: My Mom, my Dad, and my good friend, Travis.

Brando and I: each person in my family.

"What do you suppose being successful means?"

Justinb: When they have done what they wanted to do, or almost done what they wanted to do. He then quoted something about Thomas Edison.

Shawners: I don't know.

Me: I like Justinb's answer so much, I'm going with it.

Brando: Making a goal and meeting it, in everything in life.

"Tell me about God."

Shawners: He...

helps people with stuff.

loves everyone.

always sees what you say and knows what you say.

knows if you're going to hell or heaven.

everyone loves him. Except for some people. Like Satan.

Is this what a relaxed weekend looks like?

I have a question for you guys. Is it "normal" to go, go, go, with nary a break in between? The past four months have been that way with me. My answer to, "Can we get together this weekend?" has been, "No, I'm sorry. But we can get together in FOUR weekends!" (and if you get back to me next week, then it will probably be six weekends, sorry!). This weekend is the first weekend where we have NOTHING planned, and Justinb's games were cancelled because of the weather so we literally have nothing planned. Is it unusual in most of your lives to have a weekend where nothing is planned back-to-back, or at all? Or is that the norm?

I'm breathing a sigh of relief this weekend that I don't have anything planned, but on the other hand I'm looking forward to my big plans coming up on the weekends! I also know this coming week I'll probably give myself a hard time for not getting out more THIS weekend. There is a dragon boat festival we could attend! However, I've also given this weekend to Brando for his birthday weekend to do what he wants with even if it is nothing ; ) so that's up to him whether we go or not.

Family and Friends

Christmas Eve we spent with my sister and her family at their house. We had pizza, salad, english toffee, and spiced wine. Yummy and easy. We exchanged gifts and it was so sweet to see Justinbustin's presents for them. He had a budget of $50 for his two cousins, and the three of us and he bought the sweetest presents! A kitchen knife for my chef nephew - his cousin, a car magazine for his car enthusiast cousin, a video game magazine and a ornament coke bottle for Brando, two Pokemon toys for Shawners, and a pyramid of Ferrero Rochers for me. I think he even had money left over! My middle nephew's sweet gift to us was a special time with him going wherever they want, and a few nights of babysitting for us! It was a special time spending Christmas Eve with my sis and her family, and a special new tradition we've begun for the last two years.

Christmas day the boys woke up and we all opened our stockings on Brando's and my bed. Then they brought the gifts from under the tree two by two and we spent the next hour and a half opening all our gifts on our bed, starting with Santa gifts. Shawners got a plethora of Pokemon toys, cards, and movies - exactly what he asked for. And Justinbustin got a huge Star Wars lego set that he has spent eight hours working on putting together since. He's almost done! He actually asked for a PSP or an iTouch but was reminded Santa doesn't do that expensive of gifts. Star Wars lego set was stretching it as it was!! My mom bought the boys remote control trucks which reminds me of Christmas mornings in SC, driving around and seeing all the remote control cars out on the streets from being opened that morning for Christmas. Santa did good this year, and all the gifts from our family were so sweet and thoughtful.

I made a baked frittata and raspberry crepes for breakfast and our neighbors, aka Justinbustin's substitute teacher and her hubby and two boys, came over for breakfast. They stayed for about three hours drinking mimosa's and coffee and visiting while the four boys played together. We've never had people over for Christmas before and it was a total blast. I can't wait to do it again!

We spent the afternoon brushing Brownie with her new furminator. We ended up with a pile of fur about a foot by a foot big!! It was AMAZING! I can actually pet her now without her fur flying all over the place or walking away with fur all over my clothing.

For dinner I made garlic and thyme crusted prime rib, mashed potatoes with au jus gravy, cranberry & feta salad, while KT joined us for Christmas dinner and brought an Alabama specialty - turnips and macaroni and cheese (she made it healthy by making it whole wheat). She also brought a DELICIOUS super soft bread from Whole Foods - yum!! I gave her the new Brittney Spears CD, Circus, a few days ago when we went shopping for Christmas because she mentioned she had wanted it a few months ago. I was so glad she hadn't got it for herself yet!! I told her she better not buy me anything in return, but she did - gorgeous silver etched earrings from Macy's that I absolutely LOVE. We had more mimosas for dinner, because she'd never had one and she hung out for about four hours. Another fun time with friends we've never experienced on Christmas before!! The kids LOVEd having their former babysitter over, and her and I sat at the table long after everyone was gone and cracked ourselves up until we were holding our stomachs and our faces were bright red from laughing too hard.

She left to go spend time with her little sister, and Brando and the boys and I settled in to watch Elf and laugh our heads off. I can't believe I hated that movie the first time I watched it!! It must've been my aversion to Will Ferrell that kept me from actually seeing the movie. Now with the boys doubting Santa's existence this year, and Santa having to write a detailed letter to Shawners explaining how he can live in the freezing Antarctic, how his reindeer can fly, how he can make it to all the houses in one night, and why he can't wake him up when he drops off the presents (last time he did that he didn't make all his deliveries and the elves made him promise not to do it again!!), I totally got into the spirit of Elf and believing in the Christmas spirit to make Santa's sleigh fly! I even sang along with Zooey Deschanel aka Emily to Santa Claus is Coming to Town!!

What a perfect way to end the evening as we finished up our movie and tucked the boys in bed. Shawners cuddling with his teddy bear in a sweater that Gma gave him, dressed in his moose pajama pants that I gave him to match the ones I gave Brando and Justinbustin (mine are pink with owls in scarves and hats and white pine trees - so cute!!), and Justinbustin big man stretched all over his bed that he is almost as big as.

Brando and I fell asleep to Fred Clause, and I savored the thing that I enjoyed most about Christmas this year. The fact that we are together, and happy. After hearing about my friend's husband moving out last week, it struck me how shallow I had been with gifts and realized I could have returned them all and been happy just having my family with me and being happy together with having friends there as a sweet added bonus.

Thanksgiving Week

Arriving in San Jose, picking up a Sa*ab to drive in for the week, eating at In N Out, driving straight to Ol*vehurst/Plum*s Lake. Turkey dinner on Sunday with my brother's ex-wife and three kids, my sister, her hubby, and their five kids, my parents, and us. Seeing her new 2600 sq.ft. that had more than enough room for all of us, and more than enough room for six cooks in the kitchen. Watching the kids play, play, play their hearts out and spend every night with my mom and dad in their RV they brought up from Santa Cr*z. Playing games with my sister and her hubby every night and with my ex SIL and niece before they went home. Liars dice, skipbo, Uno. Driving to Placerv*lle to meet Brando's family I've never met in eight years. Going from flat land valley Cali to mid size mountains and tall pine trees. Being EXTREMELY bored with people I've hardly met before. Getting over it and playing golf cards with Justinbustin. Shawners joining in, then Oma, then a cousin. Thanksgiving dinner with two cousins and an aunt of Brando's I'd never met before. Pictionary with Justinbustin and Oma on my team. Waking up early in the morning. Going to Apple Hill with Brando's family and discovering the quaintest experience I've ever experienced. Taking gorgeous mountainous pictures. Buying fudge, apple pies, apple cider, and Christmas ornaments. Watching the rest of the family take off to see a veteran's memorial. Going to our first. ever. wine tasting with Brando. Taking kissy pictures in the vineyard. Watching my sons collect pine cones outside the window while we wine tasted. Meeting the family-owned estate owner's son. Having birthday cake for Shawners birthday with Oma. Driving home in order to have a full day in Santa Cr*z. Playing more games with my sis and her hubby. Going out downtown with my good friend, Jef. Waking up early and taking boudoir pictures at U*SC campus. Laughing at the guy biking by on the bike trail nearby biking by and asking if that's a n*ked lady in the grass. Thinking in my head, "No! You're imaging things!!" Finding out I need to get linger*e for Brando at Hot Top*c instead of Vici's. Going to my dad's financial class. Seeing how cute he is with all the little things he does for his clients. Payday bars, lucky pennies, cash drawings, cute analogies, tear-jerking stories. Going on a sailboat with Jef, his girl, Brando, the boys, and my parents. Spending two hours on the Monterey Bay with wine, beer, pizza, and good company. Drinking way too much wine. Going to the Boardwalk any way after we get off. Riding the sky rider with Brando. Taking pictures to ease my fear of hanging 200 ft. about the ground with no way to get down. my Dad and the boys there. Watching them have a good time without being involved or them knowing I was there. Stalking them and taking pictures.  Riding the pirate ship with Brando and laughing at the guy giving me evil looks for standing up. Going home and taking a nap. Oversleeping our dinner date with good friends. Picking up Jef and his girl again to go to dinner with us and other friends. Eating dinner with Cris & Kris and their sweet baby boy. Shopping downtown. More games with my sis and her hubby, this time with Jef and his girl, too. Hanging out with his new girl, the longest girl he's had, that I absolutely love and adore and hope he marries the heck out of her one day. Going over to a friend of Brando's afterwards. Playing the Wii until the wee hours of the morning. Waking up. Hanging out with my sister at Trader Joe's. Going to breakfast at my favorite restaurant ever, Peachwoods. My dad attempting to take me shopping. Giving hugs. Oma's tears. Going home.

My Grandpa Just Died

My Dad's dad, my first grandpa, died about 7 years ago, just after Justinbustin was born. My Grandma remarried about two years ago, and then divorced a year later. In the time she was married he was the only great grandpa my children knew. The one who let them drive the golf carts completely on their own while sitting on his lap. The one who built miniature towns in his backyard. The one who was absolutely in love with my Grandma. The one who asked me, "So you're my new granddaughter?" The one I asked if I could still call Grandpa after they divorced. Really, I probably spent more time with him than my own Grandpa. Once I was old enough to make my own decisions about who I got to know in my family I had just started to get to know my Dad's dad when he died. Grandpa Rudy had a stroke about a month ago, and was getting better. He had another stroke Christmas Eve, then got pneumonia, and contracted MRSA from the hospital. His body couldn't hold up anymore. I had no idea he was dying.

I am so sad. What will I tell my children when they ask where he is?

Oooh Christmas!

It's the most wonderful day of the year! So it has been today. Woke up this morning to the boys bringing in their stockings and opening them on our bed. Brando and I opened ours afterwards - mine was filled with underwear as it is every year (because I never buy underwear for myself and Brando picks out the cutest ones), only this time each pair had jewelry wrapped up in it! I made out with tons of fun new jewelry! Oh, yes, and Santa brought us each a ticket to see Water Horse this afternoon.

Our tree was so flooded with presents this year we didn't even bring out the batch from Brando and I for the boys until this morning and decided to pace the opening for the day. So after stockings and a few presents we had our french crepes with blackberry jam, fresh blackberries, raspberries, strawberries, powdered sugar and whipped creme for breakfast. Then opened a few more presents, got dressed to go and see Water Horse (which was FABULOUS, but INTENSE for a kids' movie - I walked away feeling a little stressed from all the intensity!). After the movie we came home and opened a few more presents and stuck the brown sugar ham in the oven. Which was a total fire hazard (don't try this at home) because we then changed clothes real quick to go take photos on top of the cliffs near the 360 bridge. We took both of our cars and loaded Brownie up in one of them so she could get in on the family photos.

After our photo shoot with a gorgeous view we were more than ready for Christmas dinner. We got home and the boys opened more gifts while we put the garnet yam souffle in the oven and put the french green beans in the steamer. Brando and I finally sat down to open some of our presents and watch the boys (finally) open the rest of their presents. I made out with a gorgeous nightie from Free People, cash, Ferrero Rocher's (my FAVORITE), Williams-Sonoma Peppermint Bark, two pairs of beautiful dangly earrings, and a gorgeous diamond necklace form Stephan's. Totally made out like a bandit this year! Brando got a gorgeous brand new Canon camera, a digital photo frame (you're right Courtney, TOTALLY fun gift! Unfortunately I wasn't the one who got it for him), a set of handblown shot glasses from me, a dress shirt, and a few ties.

Christmas dinner was absolutely delicious with sparkling apple cider and hawaiian sweet bread. Now I must run and help with the mass clean up of new toys and putting of little children to bed!